The Lowe-Down

At a church service I attended recently, we were invited by the preacher to turn to the people around us and share a story of when we have heard God speak to us. I turned to my lovely wife who looked at me and said, “I think I’ve heard all your stories”. Slightly deflated, I shifted my attention to a good friend sitting in front of me. “I think I’ve heard all your stories too” they said apologetically. I was mortified. Did I have nothing new to offer? Had it been so long since anything of note happened to me that all my stories were old news? It couldn’t be that I had simply over-shared recently. Being a serious introvert, it takes a very particular set of social conditions to draw out any sort of extended dialogue from me. Trying to think rationally about the situation, I had to acknowledge that it was probably fair enough that my wife knew all my stories. In fact, I was prepared to take it as an indication of the health of our marriage!
“See,” I thought to myself with just a hint of self-righteousness, “I do communicate!”
(I suspect my wife may have a slightly different view, but this is my blog so I’m going to claim the win).

But what of my friend? Surely, I had something new to tell them? It turns out that my fears were in part unfounded because they later confessed that their response was driven largely by their own introvert discomfort – an admission I wholeheartedly endorsed. It got me thinking though. There is a real danger that life can become so familiar and comfortable that we cease to challenge ourselves and create new stories. Like an old, scratched, vinyl record, the needle hits that one spot and all we hear is the same line on repeat (or for those of you too young for vinyl, imagine you accidently hit repeat on your favourite song on Spotify and then can’t turn it off! Again, probably an oldie’s problem but you get what I mean). So how do we recognise when life has stalled or stagnated a bit and it is time to shake things up?

Preventing Stagnation: Breaking Free from the Monotony

It’s easy to fall into the rhythm of daily life, finding comfort in the familiar and routine. However, there comes a point when the mundane can transform into stagnation, leaving us wondering how we ended up in a loop of predictability. The key, I suspect, is to be proactive in preventing ourselves from getting stuck in these moments. In the words of Leonardo da Vinci, “Iron rusts from disuse; water loses its purity from stagnation… even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.” Routine and ordinary tasks are a real and healthy part of life but there is a difference between being “in the groove” and being “stuck in a rut”. So, if we are to be proactive about avoiding stagnation, what might that look like? Here are three suggestions that I have come across:

1. Embrace Change as a Constant: To prevent stagnation, it’s essential to adopt a mindset that sees change as a constant and not as an occasional disruption. Embracing the idea that growth often comes from discomfort allows us to welcome new experiences rather than shying away from them. Not that I find his easy. Most of us are conditioned to avoid discomfort and seek pleasure. Perhaps we should seek to be more like Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (British author and creator of the famous Sherlock Holmes character), who once declared, “My mind rebels at stagnation. Give me problems, give me work, give me the most abstruse cryptogram, or the most intricate analysis, and I am in my own proper atmosphere. But I abhor the dull routine of existence. I crave for mental exaltation.”
Consider this: What changes, no matter how small, can you introduce into your daily routine?

2. Set and Pursue Personal Goals: Goals provide direction and purpose, acting as a compass that guides us away from stagnation. Set tangible, achievable goals that challenge you to step outside your comfort zone. These could be related to career, personal development, or even leisure activities. When you achieve these goals, not only do you break the monotony, but you also create new stories worth sharing. I have a love-hate relationship with goal setting. I find setting goals helpful but the creative side of me chafes at anything that feels like a constraint. A potentially challenging question to ask yourself – What personal goals can you set for yourself to infuse a sense of purpose into your life?

3. Try New Hobbies or Activities: This one falls into the bleedingly obvious category, but it still bears mentioning. Introducing novelty into your life can be as simple as trying out new hobbies or activities. It could be anything from learning a musical instrument, taking up a sport, or delving into an artistic pursuit. Novel experiences not only provide a welcome break from routine but also contribute to personal growth. Even if the hobby doesn’t stick, the process of experimenting can be valuable – at least that is what I tell myself every time I unearth the remnants of another abandoned fad (I’m looking at you, boxing gloves!). Is there a new hobby or activity that you have been curious to explore? Maybe it’s time to take the plunge.

Knowing When It’s Time to Shake Things Up: Recognizing the Signs

Recognizing the need for change is a skill in itself. Often, life gives us subtle hints, urging us to shake things up a bit. But how do we know when it’s time to embrace a new chapter?

1. Listen to Your Intuition: In a culture that often gives emotions pre-eminence over reason, this is probably the most common advice you will hear. It goes something like this: Your gut feeling is a powerful guide. If you find yourself feeling restless or dissatisfied, it might be your intuition signalling the need for change. Pay attention to your emotions and trust your instincts.
While there is some truth to this, I would also want to say be wary of your emotions and be willing to seek the counsel of trusted friends. Intuition is valuable but our emotions can betray us. Reflect on moments when you felt a longing for something more—what were the circumstances, and how can you address those feelings?

2. Identify Signs of Stagnation: Stagnation often manifests in boredom, lack of enthusiasm, or a sense of unfulfillment. If you notice a repetitive cycle and a diminishing sense of excitement in your daily life, it’s a clear sign that it’s time to shake things up. This doesn’t have to mean giving up on something, but it may be a good prompt to change your approach. You might ask what aspects of your life feel stagnant, and how can you inject new energy into those areas?

3. Reflect on Pivotal Moments: Think back to moments in your life when a significant change led to personal growth or a memorable experience. These pivotal moments can serve as a blueprint for recognizing when it’s time to introduce change. Consider the lessons learned from these moments and how you can apply them to your current situation. It remains to be seen whether the discovery that people had “heard all my stories” was a pivotal moment or just a useful prompt for a blog post. Maybe ask me about it this time next year.

Pondering the Path Ahead

So where does this leave us? With an opportunity to interrogate our life – our hobbies, our work, our relationships, our faith – and ask ourselves if we have new stories to tell. And if we choose to embark on a journey to prevent stagnation and embrace change, we might begin by taking a moment to ponder the path ahead. Reflect on the steps we can take to infuse vitality into our life and create stories that resonate with authenticity and fulfillment. So, what changes could you make to shape the narrative of your future?